Date a Girl Who Reads

specially dedicated to my beloved husband, who, 7 years ago, made the smartest decision of dating a girl who reads, and eventually marrying her. i wish we had met in a bookstore as per my fantasy haha, but in reality, i would not have it any other way.

the rest of you have GOT to read this piece, particularly for the book nerd in you, people. i found this floating all over tumblr and it’s way too cool not to be shared.

enjoy. and prepare to be swooned.

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“..Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes. She has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.

Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag. She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she finds the book she wants. You see the weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a second hand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow.

She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.

Buy her another cup of coffee.

Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.

It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas and for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry, in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by god, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.

She has to give it a shot somehow.

Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.

Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who understand that all things will come to end. That you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.

Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.

If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.

You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.

You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.

Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.

Or better yet, date a girl who writes.”

~ Rosemary Urquico

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from google, i found out that rosemary urquico is a gorgeous young writer from the philippines. thank you for your moving piece, for your truth in its simplicity.

“..Girls who read understand that people, like characters (in books), develop. Except in the Twilight series.” haha. priceless!

and yes, honey we will spend our kerepot days backpacking across petra in jordan spewing wordsworth and dressing up to watch the royal shakespeare company on stage…

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thank you to my mr. khairul :

1. for shipping ALL my books from malaysia to dubai
2. for buying me a nice ikea bookrack to put all my books in. there are some more. we need another bookrack. or a bigger one. hihi
3. for so many books you bought me – for birthdays, for delivering your sons, to read during pantang, or just because it’s wednesday
4. for looking after the boys, feeding them cereal bars, sitting on some sofas, flipping through superbike mag while i’m lost between the shelves at borders
5. for saying, “get another one lah,” when i said the books are on sale, or when i said i can’t decide between two books
6. for breathing down my kneck, saying, “kenape? kenape? best ke?” when you see me so engrossed in pages of a book that i’m currently reading
7. for listening to me go on and on about the exciting plot of a book that i’m reading though it bores you to the bone
8. for willing to spend A LOT on books. mine, and the boys’. hihi. (well, would you rather me spending your money on ferragamos and jimmy choos? hah!)

this girl who reads loves you very much!